Frequently Asked Questions About How To Find The Right Counseling Services For You

Are you interested in getting counseling services? If your answer is yes, then you have to start with finding the right counselor for you. A good relationship between the patient and counselor is essential because the result greatly depends on it. 

Read on to get some tips on finding the right counselor for you.


First, you have to consider your condition, budget, and health insurance coverage. There are various kinds of counseling services. Typically, they cater to different mental health conditions.

You can also choose between an individual, couple, or family therapy. Moreover, mental health providers also have different specializations.

Another thing you have to consider is your budget. Check which mental health services are under your health insurance. There may be limits on the health insurance coverage, so you have to consider your funds before moving on.

Next, try to seek referrals. There are several ways to find a counselor. One tip is to refer to the list of providers of your health insurance.

You can also ask your family members and friends if they know some counseling centers they could recommend. Moreover, some mental health organizations may help and refer some counselors for you.

The third step is to check the counselor’s and clinic’s credentials. Make sure to look into their education, training, and license. Check whether your condition and the provider’s specialization are a good match.

Also, examine if the clinic’s treatment approaches fit your condition or not. You can also look for reviews from previous patients.

Next, you have to determine whether you are comfortable with the counselor. During your first appointment with the counselor, you can instantly gauge if you feel comfortable. It is essential that you feel relaxed when talking with them because it greatly affects the results.

Trust is an important factor in the healing process. You have to trust your counselor enough to tell them about your feelings and experiences.

Now you’ve chosen your counselor, here are some frequently asked questions to help you through the counseling process.

What are the counseling services?

Many institutions are now offering counseling services to take care of their community’s well-being. The counseling services usually cater to:

  1. Group counseling
  2. Individual counseling
  3. Wellness workshops
  4. Consultation
  5. Referrals
  6. Referrals self-help resources

What are the 3 types of therapy?

There are several types of therapy available for people suffering from mental or emotional distress. Some types of therapy are

  1. Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy,
  2. Dialectical Behavior Therapy,
  3. Exposure Therapy,
  4. Eye Movement Desensitization
  5. Reprocessing Therapy
  6. Interpersonal Therapy.

How do you know if a counselor is right for you?

There are three things to consider in choosing the right counselor for you: safety, capability, and connection. Your counselor should make you feel safe to share essential details about yourself. The counselor should also display competence in answering and dealing with your concerns.

Importantly, you should listen to your gut whether the therapist is right for you. Observe if you feel heard and understood. Make sure you can freely express your emotions and thoughts.

How much is a typical counseling session?

The cost of a typical counseling session usually averages from $60 to $120. If you’re covered by health insurance, the average rate can fall from $20 to $50 per session. Expenses vary on the number of booked sessions and the health insurance coverage.

What are the five stages of counseling?

The basic counseling structure usually includes

  1. Rapport/ relationship building
  2. Assessment
  3. Setting of goals
  4. Intervention
  5. Termination

The five stages of counseling show constant progress from one step to the next. It aims to achieve the client’s goal and enhance well-being.

What can I expect from a counseling session?

You should expect to answer general and personal questions about yourself. At first, you’re going to talk about yourself, including your occupation, academic background, hobbies, and interests.

As the session progresses, it might require you to answer questions about your childhood, relationships, and others.

A counseling session usually lasts for 50 minutes and must occur in private. It should be in a quiet room with just the two of you present. Before going to anything else, the counselor or therapist must first discuss confidentiality and session plans.


What is the difference between therapy and counseling?

Therapy focuses more on your thoughts, behaviors, and self-perception. It tries to uncover underlying patterns that contribute to you as an individual. Meanwhile, counseling often focuses on a specific issue.

Therapy usually lasts longer. Counseling attempts to resolve a particular problem for a limited time.

What are the 4 types of talk therapy?

There are many types of talk therapy. Some talking therapies include

  1. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
  2. Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT)
  3. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy
  4. Counseling, Behavioral Activation
  5. Interpersonal Therapy (IPT)

What is the best type of therapy for anxiety?

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is the most effective therapy for anxiety disorders. It is also an efficient treatment for other disorders like anxiety, phobias, among several other conditions.

Can I trust a therapist?

It’s completely understandable not to trust your therapist right away. It can be challenging to open up to a stranger right off the bat. Your reaction may stem from your experiences as well. It may take some time to establish a therapeutic relationship.

However, a good therapist can make you feel secured through time. Remember that therapies and counseling sessions observe confidentiality. Nothing you say will leave the session without your consent.

Do therapists judge you?

Everyone has judgments. However, therapists base their judgments on knowledge and not on gossip. They look at your behavioral patterns and thought processes for a diagnosis. Therapists don’t use it as a topic at lunch with friends.

Will a therapist tell you your diagnosis?

The delivery of diagnosis must be a collaborative process within the therapeutic relationship. You have the right to know your diagnosis. It’s also essential to take part in the discussion about the matter.

If you’re not comfortable knowing your diagnosis, it’s better to discuss it with your therapist. They may have a requirement to give a diagnosis as part of insurance coverage.

Is therapy worth the money?

Therapy is worth your money. However, it’s necessary to know that therapy doesn’t solve your problems. You have to do the hard work to solve or find relief in the issues you’re dealing with.

While some therapy may seem expensive, it’s a good investment. It helps in making good choices in the future.

How much does a therapist cost a month?

The average cost of therapy ranges from $65 to $250 per hour. Depending on your state, you can spend $100 to $200 for a therapy session. Many factors affect the therapy cost, such as the therapist’s training and reputation, location, insurance coverage, session length, and specialization.

What do you do if a therapist is too expensive?

There are various options for you if you find yourself unable to afford professional help. First, you may try to go to a training clinic. You can find these clinics are in universities where graduate students are preparing to become clinical psychologists.

You may also visit your community health center. Some provide free or low-cost therapy options and services covered by the state government.

You may also join support groups and ask local therapists for book recommendations to become aware of quality resources. Also, check your insurance as they can provide a list of providers appropriate for your situation.



Counseling is a great way to help improve your mental and emotional concerns. It has proven to be effective in managing anxiety and other conditions over the years.

It is essential to find the right counseling service, but it can be challenging. Counseling services are not “one size fits all,” so you have to be thorough with choosing a clinic and a counselor. Mental health providers have different specialties.

Remember that it does not matter how you and your provider are far along in the process. You shouldn’t be afraid to consult a different counselor if you think your current counselor is not right for you.

Remember, though, that counseling goes both ways. You have to cooperate with your counselor for the process to work. Answer their questions as honestly and as you can.

Also, trust them enough to say as much of your feelings. All information may play an essential role in the results of your counseling. Always be prepared for your appointments.

However, you have to inform your counselor if you feel uncomfortable sharing specific experiences with them. They understand how difficult it is to share your traumatic experiences with other people. They trained to help people overcome their problems without causing further trauma.

The number of appointments you will have with your counselor depends on your progress. Do not worry if you’re taking too long to heal. Counseling takes time. Be patient throughout the process and avoid skipping appointments to avoid messing up your progress.

Maintain a good relationship with your counselor and always do your assignments. All these little details will affect the results of your counseling.

Always remember that investing in your mental health is essential. Do not hesitate to find and consult a counselor to help you overcome your traumas and other concerns. As opposed to what most people say, counseling is not just for mentally ill people. It can help everyone.

Frequently Asked Questions About Knowledge Of Self


Empathy – a simple word that speaks volumes.

I had been interested in empathy ever since my psychology teacher in high school said that empathy was one of the little ingredients that could make or break a person. Our classroom discussion went on like this:

Teacher: Suppose you go to school every day with your head held too high, and you cannot be bothered to look at classmates who need your help. What will happen when you need help from them?

Student: No one will pay attention to you.

Teacher: Correct! What do you think will happen if you always try to understand others and find a way to help them?

Student: They will do the same for you.

Teacher: Yes, that’s correct! Acting like the student in the first scene shows that you have zero empathy and do not care about other people. As a result, they will not waste their energy trying to care for you. Consequently, when you become empathic towards others, they will not hesitate to return the favor anytime. 

Me: Why do people react that way?

Teacher: Everything boils down to the theory of mind.


What is the theory of mind, and how does it develop? 

 The theory of mind refers to a person’s ability to understand how others think or feel. According to studies, it starts as early as infancy. For instance, when a baby sees their parents crying, they may do the same even if they cannot possibly know what has caused their mom and dad to cry. 

When the kids reach early childhood, that’s when they manage to connect actions to emotions. It also evident in children who throw a fit at the mall when they can’t get the toys they want, knowing that their parents will have no choice but to buy the toys to stop their tantrums. Similarly, the kids may realize that the adults may not believe what they are saying unless they show it.

As they grow up, these youngsters will predict what someone will say or feel before doing it. They may also understand the real meaning behind others’ actions and expressions.

Who came up with the theory of mind? 

 David Premack and Guy Woodruff thought of using the term “theory of mind” in 1978.

Is the theory of mind universal? 

 Yes, the original assumption is that the theory of mind is universal. Various studies have tried to disprove it, but they have failed to do so.

What is the theory of mind and autism? 

 The theory of mind pertains to understanding an individual’s feelings and thoughts before they even open their mouths or change their expressions or behaviors. However, studies have shown that people in the autism spectrum find it challenging to figure out others’ minds. As a result, they cannot communicate properly with other folks.


How does the mind develop? 

 The mind develops by allowing people to gain new experiences. The development can begin when an infant starts to see their surroundings and recognize faces, colors, or situations. For instance, if they are used to seeing their mom or dad all the time, they may know it if another person is in front of them. Then, they either cry or let others hold them – a sign that the baby is aware of the stranger and feels either scared or curious.

Can you teach the theory of mind? 

 Yes, you can teach the theory of mind. Many specialists tend to train autistic individuals to recognize, analyze, and interpret others’ emotions and actions. This way, they can interact with people and lead a regular life. 

What is the theory of mind example? 

 Hunger is an ideal example of the theory of mind. Since you feel hungry, you want to act on your desire to eat any food to get your hands on. Then, you realize that others can feel that way out of hunger, too. In this case, the theory of mind is somehow connected to the attribution theory.

Kindness is another example of the theory of mind. When you show compassion towards others, you can make them happy. This emotion is revealed through a smile, a handshake, or even a hug, which lets you know that being kind can result in positive things.

Is the theory of mind an executive function? 

 An executive function pertains to a neural process that dictates how you will behave, think, and feel during a particular situation. Since executive functions develop in the same brain area related to the theory of mind, many experts believe that the latter is an executive function. 

What is the false belief in the theory of mind? 

 Specialists use the false-belief task to assess a kid’s mental development. 

Suppose a boy and a girl are asked to bring two lunchboxes to the cafeteria. Both have a sandwich in each lunchbox, but only the girl has a juice box. When she gets up, she does not see the boy move the juice box to his lunchbox before leaving, too. 


The girl will fail the task if the teacher tells her to bring out the juice box, and she opens the boy’s lunchbox, knowing full well that it is not supposed to be there. She will succeed if she goes straight to her lunchbox.

How does the false belief test measure development of the theory of mind?

The false-belief test is typically used to measure kids’ development between the ages of 4 and 5, considering that’s when they start deductive reasoning. What happens is that the specialist presents two options, and they need to choose the correct one. Say, between a pen and chalk, what will you use to write on a blackboard?

If the child picks chalk, it entails that their mind is developing well. In case they select the pen, they fail the false-belief test. The reality is that people with autism tend to fail this test.

Final Thoughts

The theory of mind has had such a massive impact on my teenage self that I ended up getting a bachelor’s degree in psychology for this reason. It turned out to be an incredible decision, given that I went on to become a licensed psychologist and help many people understand the positive and negative effects of their actions.


Family Help: How Affirmations Boost Children’s Self-Esteem





Most parents are aware of how vital it is to show their children love, encouragement, and support, but they also know how important it is for their children to develop all these within themselves. It is very encouraging for kids to develop positive attitudes and beliefs because this helps them accept failure appropriately and be unbreakable against other people’s judgments and criticisms.


As our kids acquire behaviors and teach their brains, affirmations are very powerful tools that help them nurture self-belief in their childhood years, which will linger with them throughout their whole lives. All of us create our belief systems about who we are and how we see the world from our perspective. Our family, friends, significant others, the magazines that we read, and the shows that we watch can cause either damage or help us become better versions of ourselves.


Affirmations are an inspiring and enriching way of establishing a positive attitude and raising happy and respectful children – children who know how to nurture their inner selves and enjoy the wonders of their childhood. Thus, an affirmation means to assert oneself. These are positive and enlightening words that the mind cultivates to develop one’s belief systems. When these affirmations are learned and practiced, they take effect when the belief is challenged.


For instance, if your affirmation is “I am beautiful the way I am,” and somebody calls you dumb and ugly, your affirmation will come up to remind you of it. The positive result would be to think, “I am not dumb and ugly. I am beautiful.” If your child has not learned that positive belief, then he might just consider what he heard and believe that he is indeed dumb and ugly. The more these affirmations are practiced and repeated, the stronger they become.


How to Introduce Affirmations 

Talking to your kids about utilizing affirmations is a very good decision for parents. This will help them understand what they’re for and how to do them properly. Try to keep the practice as interesting and uplifting as possible. Tell them that affirmations help you learn to think positively. They inspire you to believe in yourself and to control your temper when you feel sad, grumpy, or angry. Or perhaps you can say it like this: “Let’s try to practice thinking happy thoughts. If you keep doing them routinely, you’re going to remember them and use them to your advantage.”


Another means of introducing affirmations to your kids is to use affirmation cards. You can place these cards in different parts of your home, particularly in areas where they are most visible. Simply reading them will stimulate their minds to remember them. Their bathroom mirrors, the door of the fridge, or their study tables are areas where you can place these affirmation cards. Additionally, it would be a great reinforcement if you lead by example and recite positive beliefs as well. You can say these with them or recite them by yourself so that they are encouraged to it themselves. Ultimately, working on these affirmations as a family is the best first and the last step that would help all of you succeed in your journey towards personal development.


How Affirmations Can Be Effective

Self-talk. One of the essential lessons that affirmations provide is learning to be confident with talking to yourself in front of the mirror. When you talk with love, respect, and kindness to yourself, you instill more goodness in your heart and mind. A lot of people still find it difficult to look at their reflection in the mirror and compliment what they see. Positive affirmations practically help build your self-image without anybody’s help but yourself. Try saying good words about the reflection that you see in the mirror and say them out loud. When you regularly do this, it becomes more comfortable, and you begin to feel good about yourself as you slowly believe and instill the positive words that you are affirming for yourself.


Most children find this method daunting and awkward at first, and you may need to show them and then do it with them in the first few weeks for them to feel more comfortable. If they don’t want to do it, don’t force them. Affirmations should be helpful and encouraging and not something to be feared and dreaded.


Repetition. When affirmations are recited regularly, they become more ingrained into the mind, and that is when they become very effective. Experts say that saying these phrases aloud three times will boost one’s self-esteem each time. This further affirms a person’s belief. You may want to try working on it with your child once or twice a week initially, depending on how your child will feel with every affirmation. If there is a phrase that he is struggling with more, spend more time on it.



These affirmations take time and some effort, so you should discuss it with your child to get a better perspective of how he feels and his level of interest. You could make a list of your child’s positive qualities to help him kick-start his journey towards becoming the best version of himself. Positive affirmations must always be initiated in a fun, relaxed, and natural way. Use them to encourage your children to love and respect themselves the way they should be.



Is Your Life Falling Apart Because Of The Pandemic?

Sugar-coating exists because there are times that it is hard to talk about things. That is if it involves emotional and mental reasons. As we continuously experience the changes due to this pandemic, we accumulate more difficulties along the way. Sometimes, we find ourselves tired, and it feels like we are about to give up. With all the instant adjustments we have to deal with and struggles we need to handle, everything is too much. But not all hope is gone. If we somehow think our life is falling apart, here are some of the few things we need to remember.


Remember That The Struggle Is Temporary

What is happening right at this moment might not be beneficial, but soon it will all end. It might not happen right in this second, but everything we are going through will pass. Yes, the process may take quite a while, and the adjustment and sacrifices must be made. But soon, it will be worth it. We may not always recover from this traumatic event, but all of us will find a way to go on with life regardless of the severity of the pandemic’s impact. Our pain and suffering ask for patience. Therefore, we must understand that grieving and recovering from this event is not a linear process.


Allow Things To Just Happen

For us to live an active and meaningful life, we need to focus on things around us. Admittedly, we want to take control of our lives before we can say that we live on the fullest. However, in this time of crisis, we need to acknowledge that there are limited things that we have control over.  So instead of forcing ourselves to analyze the things we think we can prevent, it is much better if we allow it to happen. That way, we can assess our capability in handling situations, and what degree of control is healthy for us. We need to understand that no matter how cautious we are, things can still happen unexpectedly.


Believe That We Can Turn Things Around

We can’t get to choose what life should bring to us. Same as we can’t decide whether this situation should come to an end. However, the thing we can do is manage our lives so that it can take us to where we want to be. Instead of complaining about the things we can’t control, we need to use our ability to adapt. If we find ourselves in a dead-end, we must realize that things won’t change unless we make an effort to change it. Yes, it may take a few tries before we can finally get accustomed to what’s going on. But understanding that fear is useless is essential. We need to focus on things that can fall into places instead of overthinking about the things that may fall further apart.


Note That We Are Not Alone

Most times, this pandemic is causing us a lot of emotional and mental stress. That is because we somehow think that we are alone in this battle. We believe that our problems are unbearable. We focus so much on our pain because we chose to attach all the negativity we experience in this situation. Plainly, life is unfair, and the level of struggle at this moment is different from one another. But if we take a look around, we will come to realize that we have each other. Each one of us has someone out there that genuinely cares for us no matter what. Someone else just like us is trying their best to make it through the day without collapsing.

A Motivational Reflection During A Pandemic Crisis


With all the piled up uncertainties caused by the Coronavirus outbreak, perhaps you are now on the verge of breaking down. You feel lost and confused about what could happen to the world in the next few months. You have questions like, “when will this whole thing be over?”, “what will be left for humanity after this health crisis?” or “will people survive if this situation gets worse?” Well, to be honest, no one can tell. Even experts are unsure about the whole process of surviving.

Though you may think negatively about the situation, this pandemic crisis is an eye-opener to everyone. It is where you witness the good and bad sides of humanity where people can be selfish or giving. It is the moment that makes you realize how valuable life is that a single mistake can ruin it in an instant. So with all the negativity you see and hear every day, how can you find inner peace? Is there a way you can motivate yourself to continue living through all these unfortunate circumstances?


Think About Your Loved Ones

Perhaps you can say that it is okay to feel sorry for yourself because everyone is feeling the same. You might also think that it is somehow useless to stay positive during this global crisis because people already accepted their doom. But think about your loved ones. Are they not enough reason for you to fight and continue living despite the unfortunate situation? Do the people around you deserve a broken heart only because you believe there is no hope? Will you be brave enough to admit that your way of thinking is making them more terrified and anxious even more? Think about it. The whole situation may be scary, but being with the people you value the most is the important thing right now. Use your loved ones as an inspiration to regain your emotional and mental strength.


Think About Your Desire To Live

Though not all people are taking the situation seriously, some of them are dying to end this. There are those individuals who cannot support and feed themselves. That despite their miserable condition, quitting never crossed their minds. That is because they motivate themselves to fight the hardships this pandemic is causing them. They use their desire to see a better future to handle even the worst cases of this global health crisis. There are also those individuals who already lost their family and friends but are more than willing to stay strong. So why not think like them? Think about your desire to live, not only for your family or special someone but for yourself. Think about your purpose in life.


Think About The Experience

If God allows this crisis to be over, you will thank yourself for staying strong despite unfavorable circumstances. You will soon get back to your normal life where you study or work, and spend time with friends and family. The experience you will get from this pandemic situation will become your best asset in looking at things from a different perspective. You will begin to realize that life is more important than anything else in the world. The whole situation will allow you to learn skills that are useful in surviving a more critical condition compared to this current one. The experience you have right now will become your foundation for a more stable physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual strength.

If you give up now, you will lose everything when this whole pandemic crisis is over. So think about the opportunity life is giving you to fight and become a better version of yourself. If you need more advice on positivity, check out BetterHelp. They posts articles on their Facebook page and some quotes on their Instagram.

Is Counseling Therapy Saving A Marriage Or Trying To End It?



“[I]f we have the tools to understand, empathize, listen to and connect with our partners within and outside of conflict, we can have the fulfilling relationships that we were meant to have,” says licensed marriage and family therapist Robyn D’Angelo.

We know that couple’s counseling is a process that helps us in assessing our marital differences. As much as married couples are concerned, they allow a third party or professional help to assist them because they wanted to understand how to find resolutions on their failing marriage. Is counseling a great way to determine solutions in patching things between married couples – or does it?


What Does Counseling Therapy Do?

“We often think of marital therapy as a last resort. We assume that only couples with “serious” issues should seek it. We assume that only couples in dire straits can benefit. But all couples can enhance their relationship by learning the skills taught in couples therapy,” according to Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S.

Counseling was built on the idea of saving a marriage. However, it seems that our society is using marriage counseling as another way to quickly get out of marital commitment. Instead of ironing out the couple’s differences, it seems to become a place where they tend to open up about their several issues and lobby for divorce. In fact, the procedure is quite the same. Both husband and wife are open to the holistic idea that their happiness is attainable with the help of a counselor, but pretty much end up calling it quits.

Though not all holistic counseling therapy is terrible for a relationship, it is still becoming unconventional. Depending on the type of issues and the level of marital concern, couples who decide to ask for help somehow intentionally want to justify their reasons for letting go. In some cases, it is not helpful especially for those married couples who consider the therapy as their last resort.



 The Complications Of Getting A Marriage Counseling

There is a problem with conventional counseling because there will always be a side that is leaning towards divorce. One of the couples may insist on trying to fix the marriage, but one of them is looking for valid ways to end it. From there, each session becomes stressful and frustrating to both of the couples as well as the therapist. In some cases, the pair will take counseling but will not consider amendments at all. In the end, it will become a valid argument that both of the married couples need a divorce claiming that marriage therapy didn’t work. With that circumstance, the unwillingness to resolve marital issue becomes a substantial ground for separation.




The Process Affects All

Sometimes the couples give the therapist a breaking point where they’ll see the process as unworthy of their time. The therapist will be put to pressure to conclude that the failing marriage should end because he or she will no longer be able to seek for reasons to hold the two together. It will somehow lessen the value of the therapy session because couples don’t show the effort of cooperating.

Marriage counseling is still an excellent choice for solving marital issues, but that’s if (and if) both parties are willing to address their differences. According to marriage counselor Gary Chapman, each of us “speaks a different “love language,” of which there are five: words of affirmation; acts of service; receiving gifts; quality time; and physical touch.” Therapies don’t support breakups and separations for they value relationships as well as the couples’ psychological, emotional, and behavioral aspects. But like most experts and professionals would say, divorce should have to be an option and not a goal. However, if their overall health is at stake, then they need to get out from the toxic marriage, find their happiness and get healthy and holistic well-being.



Holistic View: Things You Should Not Overdo When You’re In A Relationship


“As individuals, we benefit greatly from learning skills to manage our emotions, cope with our inner critics and become assertive. The same is true for couples: Our romantic relationships also benefit greatly when we take the time to learn and practice the skills that cultivate connection,” says Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S. But we shouldn’t overdo this connection.

There’s nothing wrong with prioritizing your relationship, mainly if you wanted to stay away from a toxic situation. It is crucial to exert an effort for your spouse or significant other as long as you know that you are happy and don’t feel pressure at all. But sometimes, you have to keep it as low key as possible because overdoing things in a relationship might cause an imbalance.

Consistent Checking – It’s normal to know your partner’s activities and interest, but continuously asking him about the same thing over and over again can start a complication. It’s not healthy in a relationship because when he gets annoyed, he might consider lying about the things that you frequently ask him such as the people he tries to connect with and priorities that he needs to do. You can let him be once in a while, so he won’t feel that he’s been choked to stay in a relationship where trust is becoming an issue.

Remember that, “You are not your relationship. Just because your relationship is in trouble, it does not mean you are a failure. Your relationship is an entity that involves you, but it is not you, and it does not determine your worth,” says Harriet Pappenheim, LCSW.

Keeping Him On Radar – keeping him on your radar will do no good. He might feel pressured that you keep on asking for his whereabouts. Though it is understandable that you have the right to know the details on his every location, it will still not strengthen the bond of your relationship because you are blocking him to do the things that he likes to do. He will feel that his freedom is on the line and eventually end up losing interest in the relationship.

Apologizing Too Much – Yes, it’s important to mend things between the two of you especially when something needs fixing. However, overdoing an apology is not going to work when you keep on making the same mistakes over again. You should consider working on the proper adjustments and not just apologize for the act. You have to make a stand at least and do necessary actions concerning your behavior.

Clinging All The Time – There’s no problem in showing affection when you are in a relationship. However, there’s always a limitation in doing an act. Clinging is a way of telling your spouse or partner that you are genuinely and emotionally attached to them, but frequently clinging unto him is irritating. He might lose interest in spending time with you because it will not serve its purpose anymore. His priorities can get affected because he’ll feel obliged to be around you all the time instead of working on things that require much of his time.



Creating A Drama – It’s probably one of the things that your significant other would want to avoid.  No one likes to deal with tons of dramas in a relationship. As much as possible, things should have their level of importance to both of you so you can work out your own set of priorities. Too much crying, complaining, and demanding will eventually lead to a toxic and hurtful relationship.

“Perhaps blowups between you and your partner are occurring more regularly. Or ongoing sticky issues and irritations are causing increased tension and resentment. If you have had little success working through relationship issues, find yourselves avoiding each other, or using hostile words or actions that cause emotional or physical hurt, professional counseling may help,” a reminder from Jane Framingham, Ph.D.

When you think about the important things that truly matter in your relationship, you can easily avoid these damaging habits. Try to focus on the holistic approach, and you’ll love how you mental, physical, and emotional balance are developing.

Healing Yourself After A Breakup




Once in our life, we tend to experience an emotional course of breakup in one of our relationships. Men and women handle pain in different ways. According to Suzanne Degges-White Ph.D., a licensed counselor, “Break-ups can definitely qualify as traumatic events and telling and re-telling the break-up story is a relatively normal reaction if it was traumatic for you.” However, both still end up undergoing vital processes of recovery such as crying, alcohol drinking, watching relatable movies, isolating, and the list goes on. They think those things will help them attain a better emotional situation, but does it?


The Effects Of Breakup



Though it is possible to love someone more than they love you, there will always be the aftermath. An abandonment rage can happen due to an excessive amount of grief, loss of control, and fear of being left alone. It’s a strong feeling that pulls you into devastation that will eventually make you lose your senses and become vulnerable to several mental and psychological imbalances. In most cases, your overall performance gets affected as well as your behavior. It’s pretty much common that you feel depressed after heartbreak, but it shouldn’t have to be the center of your life. “While upsetting, these feelings usually start to lessen with time as you recover from the breakup,” said psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, Kendra Cherry, MS.


The Use Of Holistic Approach

A holistic approach to the process of healing from a breakup will depend on your ability to react to reality. The thing that can somehow control the pain is your positivity to see the different sides of the scenario. Your holistic recovery will come from your response to what’s going on around you. Your ability to strengthen your weaknesses can eventually make you grow, especially when your heartache is at its peak. You need to understand that the only way to help you is by letting yourself grow. You need to learn to empower yourself and transform the negative experiences into something beneficial for your well-being. You can find some helpful tips for that at


The Benefits Of Positivity From Negativity



Your attitude towards all the negative things that happen in your life will become the basis of your emotional struggle. So to be able to avoid those instances, you need to focus on the positive things that can help you attain a better perspective. “Learn how to express concerns constructively,” said Susan Heitler Ph.D. clinical psychologist. You can cry, lock yourself in your room, binge drink, or isolate yourself from people, but it won’t change the fact that your emotional state is at risk. When you try to acknowledge the fact that you are not that strong enough to handle the pain, you’ll eventually start to appreciate even the smallest thing that supports your effort. You’ll soon realize that you gradually feel the need for assistance, which is good in some ways because you’ll be able to identify the kind of emotional help you need. From there, you’ll have a better chance of fixing yourself. Accepting that you are weak will make you understand that there’s something within you that transforms you to become a better version of yourself. So try and be honest with yourself.

A relationship involves a lot of things that you may or may not understand at some point. There are tons of complications that you know you can expect from committing. However, it shouldn’t have to become a reason for you to stop loving. All you have to do is always look at things on the brighter side. Check out this Youtube video for inspiration.

At The Height Of Stress From A Divorce (A Relationship Battle To Maturity And Growth)



Suffering from severe stress due to the process of undergoing a divorce can increase the risk of having health problems. The significant changes in your life are sometimes unmanageable that you might end up experiencing mental, physical, and emotional health issues.

The process of divorce can make you feel alone, lonely, depressed, desperate, and hopeless. All the negative things come to you and sometimes stick for a very long period. In trying to understand what you need to do to overcome and fight the stress from your failed marriage, you have to determine the factors that affect your overall dysfunction. It’s an excellent opportunity to envision a resolution and get a holistic counseling approach that can support your developmental growth. As what marriage therapist Chana Levitan writes, “Accept and allow.”



Denial can take place when you disregard your marital issues. It’s like trying to convince yourself that you are not affected throughout the process, but in reality, it weakens you. In most cases, you try to tell yourself that things will change and eventually will get better. But the sad part is, the effect of divorce can bring too many complications on the emotional status. You’ll end up having a long-term struggle in dealing with grief from a failed relationship. You need to understand that the only thing that can save you from the devastation is to wholeheartedly accept that your marriage is over and you have to move on and start a new life without your ex-partner.


In dealing with the process of divorce, your personality changes as well. You develop intense anger that would sometimes hurt yourself. You will eventually do things that are out of your character and sometimes end up in dangerous instances that you know you’re not supposed to get into. “You get angry when you want an apology, when you want someone to change their behavior, etc.,” said psychologist Marianna Pogosyan Ph.D. Your anger is the culprit in blocking your happiness. So before you genuinely make a clear view of what you want in life after the sad experience of divorce, you need to forgive yourself and learn to lower down the aggravation. If you intentionally use anger as a coping mechanism to fight over the stress of your failed relationship, the only thing you can get is pain and suffering.



There’ll be a time that you will consider bargaining to be able to save your marriage. Even if it costs you your happiness, you’ll probably think that it won’t matter as long as you try to keep your marital state for the sake of your long-term commitment. The truth is, the act of bargaining for your happiness will not help you at all. It will only lock you in a situation that you can no longer get out from. Keeping the idea of marriage through bargaining is not a winning situation but a prison of miseries and heartaches. You need to stand up for better decisions that will give you the ultimate goal of freeing yourself from the harsh truth of a failed relationship.

A divorce is a process that attracts negativity. Sometimes you’ll end up not knowing yourself anymore. But when you think about it from a different perspective, perhaps it’s useful in helping you see things in a bigger picture. According to clinical psychologist, Susan Heitler Ph.D., “Better to end a marriage than to continue a marriage with these hurtful habits.” The sad moment in your life will give you a chance to develop your sense of purpose and maturity so that you’ll be able to understand that you need to grow and make valuable decisions that can change your life forever.